“…most historians now trace the end of the American Empire to a weekday morning in 2014”

“There were many proximate causes—a gridlocked political system, a lingering recession-induced malaise—but most historians now trace the end of the American Empire to a weekday morning in 2014 when a cat riding a Roomba glided in front of a wireless webcam.”

“Within seconds, a clip of the event (“Watch This Hitler Roomba Cat Survive a Lego Disaster”) had four million views. Within minutes, an estimated fifteen per cent of all American workers were glued to the live feed, waiting to see what would happen next. They might have drifted away, but the cat’s furious efforts to extract itself from the tripod directed the Roomba into the street, into the path of an oncoming school bus. It was saved by the swift action of a passing Vietnam veteran, who swooped in on his wheelchair and yanked the cat out of the way as the children on the bus applauded.”

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